Bend It Like Bazza

There’s a million and one adjectives I would use to describe myself. I’m not shy….there’s plenty of good ones mixed in with the negatives ones. I’ll admit I’m massively weak at X, just as I’ll say I’m pretty good at Y. In fact, I’d rarely say it, unless I’m as comfortable as can be with you, but I consider myself to be a ruthless and objective self-assessor. I won’t punish or praise myself for too long, and I’ll move on. Of all the positive or negative adjectives I could possibly use about myself, I would not use naïve as being one of them.

Very little surprises me in life. Professionally, I’ve seen plenty and there’s little that shocks or stuns me, so being naïve about X, Y and Z hardly ever happens. Are sporting events at the highest level fixed? I have little doubt. The sport that you love and adore? I’ll say somewhere, somehow, it is fixed. It may be drugs, it may be match-fixing….could be anything. Waking up as a young pup in 1988 to the news that Ben Johnson was doping in Seoul just about ruined me. The worst you can imagine, I expect it and I’m rarely surprised.

So, let’s rewind to Junior Bobby. This boy was brought up on a certain old crooner that sang ballad after ballad on any of my lengthier road trips. Holidays weren’t too common back in the day and Auntie Joan and Uncle George used to ease the burden on my folks and take me and my stinky sister (it was World Sibling Day not so long ago and that is my tribute H – you’d be disappointed if any different!) to Primrose Valley for an awesome caravan stay. I loved them. The highlight of the road trips was the music and the singing to the one and only Barry Manilow.

Growing up, I’d frequently get stick for my appreciation for Bazza and that is fair. At all the various stages of my life, Barry and Bon Jovi have been ever-presents. Totally different artists, not everybody’s cup of tea, but that’s ok. In terms of my passion for the pair, I’d categorise Bon Jovi for the music and Barry more for the words. Many a time I’d listen carefully to the words of a Barry tune and just be fascinated at what a life he must have led. So much sentiment, so much charm, so much feeling. Not that it bloody worked for me with the women, but I always enjoyed the words as much as the music.

Fast forward to three weeks ago, when I’m googling ‘Barry Manilow tour’ to find out if he’s coming back to the UK and I can wangle some tickets for my mum. To my surprise, Old Bazza has only gotten married to his manager Garry Kief. Turns out, the entire family always thought he was gay, but I literally had zero inkling at all! I guess I was completely side-tracked by the beautiful words and crafted songs written about women to ever really give it any thought over the years.

Not that anything changes – my love for Barry will indeed be eternal. I may revisit various songs just to see if I did actually miss any clues in there of course. The biggest thing springing to my mind is the fact that it’s obviously been hidden (from me any way!) until his career is coming close to an end and he is 71 years-old. That’s sad to me, but I hope it’s not stopped him from having a bit of fun!

Maybe I have a naïve side after all.

To Be Wronged Is Nothing Unless You Continue To Remember It

Most people who know me will know that my glass is never half full, or at least not for very long. I do however lean towards being half full, or quarter full, rather than half empty or three quarters empty. I have the same feelings as most people, I am far from being anything different or special in that department. I get down sometimes, I can be a miserable bugger at times and rumour has it that my patience at random times can waver. What I try to do however is not dwell on things and move on, and usually, after a bit of sulking or a quiet spell, I snap out of it pretty quickly and the smile returns.

I have had a few conversations in recent weeks which have inspired me to write this blog. I was telling a story about how my girlfriend’s car was stolen on the last day of the first year of university when we were moving out. About 95% of everything I owned was in the car and we had just booked a holiday. Given that the car was stolen when I was in the shower, I didn’t have a clean pair of socks to my name, nor a change of clothes, and we had just booked an expensive holiday. I was heartbroken.

That was horrendous at the time, but far worse was when I lost my laptop/had it stolen last winter. More than possessions, losing photos, files, work, ideas, personal details and information is far worse.

When you are 31 years old, these things happen at some point in your life. Loved ones die, accidents happen, mistakes are made. Nobody takes any joy from these things, but after a period of sadness, upset and sometimes anger, there is a reflection period and then I try to look for positives. There may not be many, but in everything we do, you can always find a positive or an opportunity – something that can offer hope.

I am in Edinburgh today. We got up and headed to the train station to find that the first train was delayed for 21 minutes which would mean that we would miss the main connecting train to Edinburgh. There may have been a curse or two I admit – why can’t trains run in the UK like they do in Switzerland? After ten of the 21 minutes had lapsed, it had dawned on me that I had left the Bon Jovi tickets at home. A quick phone call to Uncle George, who zipped down the road to pick me up and we got the tickets and back to the station with two minutes to spare. If the train had not have been 21 minutes late, we would have been sat on the train to Edinburgh without our tickets. Some strange and affected people I know may say it would have been a blessing to miss the Bon Jovi concert, but I don’t see too much hope for them.

Funny how these things happen. I am not comparing it to death or stolen items, but it is amazing how these things happen. Coincidences just come around the corner when you are not expecting them and instances which may appear to be negatives can turn into positives. With virtually everything I do, or what happens to me, I try to find opportunities from them. It keeps me sane rather than dwelling on the consequences or what may have happened.

And the exact opposite is the same for me. I always try and keep grounded when great things happen. I sometimes get called out when I say something is ‘not bad’ rather than great. I like to keep things in perspective, and when I think something is great I certainly show it. I am the guy at Goodison Park who tries to keep people grounded when we are doing well, and tries to remain calm and steady when things are desperate. It is not that I do not have the highs and lows, I have plenty of them. Controlling my emotions and balancing them is key to how I deal with things and then I make my decisions.

I got lucky this morning. If the train was 18 minutes late, we would have been in trouble. There are some days when you hit every red light when you are in a rush. These things even themselves out, you’ll get the green lights some days, you just need to remember them when everything appears red.

The $64 Million Dollar Question

A friend of mine put me in an awful quandary this weekend just gone. He asked me a question – the kind of question no man should be subjected to. It is Bon Jovi’s last concert ever….in New Jersey. It just so happens that on the same night, it is the last UFC ever also, the Brock Lesnar v Cain Velasquez rematch fight. Neither will happen ever again. No more Bon Jovi, no more UFC. There are millions of Bon Jovi fans out there, most of which deny or refuse to admit it. You know who you are. As one of the fast growing sports in the world, the UFC is becoming a hugely successful sport. They do not really combine however, I am possibly the only person on the planet to love both of them. They both start at the same time, and they are held in different continents. It wasn’t mentioned, but I suppose the UFC were banned from showing that last one on PPV also. Which do I decide?

I go for the UFC. I have seen plenty of both of them, but I have all the Bon Jovi CD’s just as I have most of the UFC fights on DVD also. The one difference is that you never know what is going to happen in a UFC fight. I know how a Bon Jovi concert is going to go and that is part of the reason why I enjoy them so much. There are other bands I enjoy, while the UFC would leave a fairly major gap for me. It is a tough call but I edge UFC in this instance.

Awful question, but it got me randomly thinking. I think one of the things I enjoy most about the UFC is the unpredictability of the outcome. It is far more unpredictable than Boxing for example. We have a running joke in our household as I describe every fight that is coming up as the best fight in years somehow ignoring the fact that I said it last month, or last week in some instances. I consider myself to be a half full kind of guy rather than half empty, but this is a different concept.

One of the things which I constantly search for in life is potential. In so many different aspects of everyday life, I am analysing things and trying to work out the potential of something. Potential is different to the half full principle – I am not hoping something may work out, I am weighing everything up and deciding whether something is worth pursuing and putting effort into to reach the end goal.

My approach to so many UFC events is excitement. I am excited for the unpredictability and the potential of some great fights – entertainment-wise and technically. The UFC ten days ago fulfilled all of that and more, and while my analysis of the fights was grossly incorrect, I was right in my feel that the potential of this event was huge.

Work and business is a prime example. I am always thinking of ways to develop myself. Ideas that may just work and require time and effort to develop. Some do, and some do not. I am fortunate enough to have a talented partner in crime who I can bounce ideas off and help me further understand the potential of an idea or thought. I can have all the thoughts in the world, but similar to betting, absorb different opinions and views, and then make the decisions. Potential is exciting. Just like a bet though, just because there is potential in something, it may not always be the right decision to go for it. I have millions of ideas coming into my head all the time, not all of them turn out to be worth pursuing or of any value, but I give them all consideration, analyse the potential and pursue or discard as appropriate.

Potential can manifest itself in many different ways. I saw potential in my cousin’s son being an Evertonian despite pretending to support Manchester United and Cristiano Ronaldo. One trip to Wembley and a Marouane Fellaini wig later, and he was converted to a blue. Perhaps that one is somewhat tenuous but I’m grabbing on to it.

Football and sport is one area which I keenly follow potential. I love nothing more than to follow young talented players and see their development. It is certainly an area which I plan to become more involved with in the future, as well as coaching. I have a good relationship with Ray Hall at the Everton Academy – I know just how proud he is when one of his Academy players makes the breakthrough to the first team. It must be a huge buzz to see a Wayne Rooney or Jack Rodwell come through the ranks and become a major star.

I guess a key element in all things potential is the ability to envision the future and forward think. Unquestionably there will always be factors along the way which can affect the development of some potential, but if harnessed in the right way and with a large spoonful of hard work, passion and dedication, that potential has every chance of succeeding. Some ideas are just not meant to happen, some players just do not get the lucky breaks they deserve, and some cousins may not have an Uncle Rob to take them to Everton games, but giving potential a shot can do no harm.

I have taken a couple of risks/chances in recent years by leaving excellent jobs. Following which, I have had a number of ideas and projects which I have worked on. I am not the only one. There seem to be a number of people I know who have done something similar and decided to take the plunge. It may seem ridiculous to some in this economy, but I think it is all about realising the potential of one’s ideas and abilities. Now, if you do not have the ideas and abilities, then you’re in a tricky situation. However, I genuinely believe that so many people I know have the potential to be successful and to make their own way through life. Inevitably there is a degree of risk in anything like this that the potential will not grow into existence, but one thing is for sure – it won’t if you leave it sat on the shelf.