Time On Hands @Airports

For somebody who works in data and analysis, one would think I’d have a better grasp on the numbers here, but all I know from 2014 is that I flew a lot and spent a lot of time in airports. A silly amount. That said, I’ve got the planning and timing side of things down to an art form now, and I rarely waste time lounging around in an airport. I say rarely rather than never because I did spectacularly goof up recently missing a flight, but if there was ever a legitimate place to add ‘highly skilled traveller’ on a CV, I’d likely scribble it. There are however often times when delays and layovers contrive to upset the best laid plans. When that does happen, there’s only one thing to do to keep sane….people watch.

From Geneva to Heathrow and vice versa, I’m tired of the furniture, the restaurants, the gates, and the Duty Free. The only thing that changes is the people. During 2014 and the hours I’ve spent in the airports, I’ve categorised people in to four main groups based on a very scientific approach (also known as boredom & BS), but I reckon there may just be something in this. I have taken people’s approach to escalators and moving walkways and lumped them in to four categories of people and their approach on life. Random yes, but let’s see if it works....bear with me!

The World Bypassers

These guys are the one who stroll on to the moving walkway and stand there. The whole wide world can just pass them by, even if they are the ones sauntering through the airport, chilled as you like, and probably blocking off the rest of the world who want to pass. They won’t even get irate if somebody gets frustrated with them, that is not their problem. They have a pace and they are happy to be taken to their destination. Don’t try rush them, they won’t be rushed, and actually, they don’t really care what you think. They’re in the zone and nothing is going to ruin that upcoming beach or chill time.

Likely Destinations: Amsterdam, California or Hawaii

The Step Walkers

The escalator may be busy, it may be completely clear, but these guys will prefer to take the stairs rather than the escalator regardless. Whether it’s a phobia of the technological options, a weight-loss/get fit tactic, or they are just on a mission to get there, it is the staircase all the way for these folks. There may be a simple, quicker, easier route to get to where they want to be, but these guys enjoy the challenge. That may involve complicating things a little at times but only because the easy route can be boring at times.

Likely Destinations: Scotland, Iceland or Switzerland

The Efficient Technologists

This group is one which is at ease with technology and buy into being economical with the path they need to take. A to B in the quickest or energy-effective method or route. They may walk on the escalator or the moving walkway, but they will take it every time. Why not get there at a reasonable pace or be economical with your energy? Incredibly logical and practical, they are likely to be superb suitcase packers, and take enough clothes to last them for just the right amount of time they are away for.

Likely Destinations: Munich, Tokyo or Singapore

The Uphill Taskers

OK so I may not have actually seen this happen other than a few pesky kids, but you get the feeling with some people and the serious march they have going on, that they would walk on either the escalator or the moving walkway in the opposite direction if it meant getting to where they needed to be – a little bit like the old Gladiator show when the contestants had to run up the moving travellator. They are either panicking at the thought of missing their flight, or they just refuse to let anything or anyone get in their way. It’s just business they say, don’t take it personally. Cross them at your peril….although innocently (but on purpose) trying to slow them down can only bring some smug satisfaction. That or hope the Easyjet crew ask them to place their bulging cabin case in the impossibly small measuring device.

Likely Destinations: London City or New York

You’re sat there (all 3 of you) reading this thinking you’re a little bit of one or two of them. Or maybe it depends on the circumstance, reason for travel, or destination ahead. I think I’ve gone through all the different phases myself over the years. The biggest thing I have come to learn is that any dramas or delays are almost certainly not the fault of the staff that work in the airports. Likewise, you don’t get there any faster by getting stressed. And last but not least, if you have a bag checked in, definitely do not stress to get on the plane if you’re running late. The hassle of them rummaging through the under-carriage just to find your bag gives you a good 20 minute window…..but don’t whatever you do, upset The Uphill Taskers!

Kicking Rather Than Feeding The Downed Man

For anybody who happens to read my blog, I owe you an apology. I lied to you in my last blog about Christmas at the Estevas/Burnsies. Or should I say, the British Airport Authorities lied to us, which in turn meant I lied to you.

Learning that our flight had been cancelled was no major surprise to us. Learning that there were no possible flights out of the UK until December 30th was. Thankfully it was not quite so drastic and after a while on hold on the phones, and scouring the internet, we worked out a route back via Switzerland. I am now sat in a cold but sunny Nova Scotia and both HJ and I have smiles on our faces.

Of all the inconvenience of two significantly delayed flights, one cancelled flight, and an unnecessary round trip to Heathrow, none of that particularly annoyed me. What did annoy me was how some companies are clearly trying to maximise profits out of the chaos in London right now. We returned our hire car at Heathrow, only to return a couple of hours later to try hire another one to get home, seeing as though the trains to Leeds were all cancelled too. A taxi was slightly ridiculous so we hopped back on the bus to Europcar who promised me a car. They also offered me a great deal. Instead of £350 for hiring a car for one day, they were going to give me a special rate of £232 for the day because I had only just brought a car back – lucky me!

I am particularly stubborn about these things. I have been known to walk six miles from Leeds City Centre to Crossgates at 3am in the morning for refusing to pay what some taxi drivers want. 200 miles was a bit of a stretch this time however and it was -5c, so I had no other option than to pay the money.

Some people may argue that it is a clever business model – taking advantage of the demand and maximising revenue. The thing is, I will not use them for a good long while after this one such is my annoyance. An absolute rip off and they will only lose this one long term. At times like this, companies can really make a name for themselves and make a difference helping people who are having major difficulties. Europcar chose the other route, and I’ll abandon them from now on.

That is enough whingeing for now. I am feeling creative right now and am going to offer Christmas gifts to anybody who reads my blog. The first five people who click like on the Facebook page, and send me their address, will receive a mixed CD from yours truly early in the New Year. You should know what to expect on the CD by now so no complaints!

Happy Holidays folks!

Christmas at the Estevas/Burnsies

Christmas should be a time to relax, to spend and enjoy with your family or friends, and the hustle and bustle of working life is forgotten for a short while. Go to any airport in the UK, and in fact, most across Europe right now, and that seems like a million miles away. On Saturday we flew from Geneva to Leeds, on Tuesday we fly from Heathrow to Halifax. It was not easy, five hour delay, but at the end of the day, we got there in one piece. Tuesday may not be so easy but we’ll give it our best shot and hope for the best.

There was a point in the airport on Saturday when they announced over the system – ‘We would like to announce that all flights to London are now cancelled’. If we were flying to London, I would have been gutted. It was tough to see so many disheartened faces who may not get home, or get to see loved ones. Pretty tough though it will be far worst later in the week, when there may not be alternative flights to jump on.

Even this morning, there are some 70% of flights cancelled from Heathrow…thankfully the flight to Halifax is scheduled to leave on time today so hopefully that will be the same tomorrow. There may be live updates on my FB and Twitter pages tomorrow, though I’ll keep the language fit for children even if the worst happens. I feel sorry for the airport staff – no win situation for them and some seriously unhappy faces to deal with. My vow for the next couple of travels is to be chirpy and smiley to all airport staff.

This Christmas, HJ and I are heading to Freeport, Nova Scotia to spend the holidays with HJ’s mum. Over the last five years, we have alternated between England and Canada for Christmas, and this time, we head to Freeport – the perfect location for a wind down and to spend good quality time with family and a few animals. We are both hugely looking forward to this one as always, and it will surely be another memorable one.

All we can do is hope that the snow comes back on Christmas Day. Everybody loves a white Christmas, but not while one has to travel or work. I am not quite sure still why the UK struggles so much to deal with a touch of snowfall although Greg Dyke made some very valid points on television. It is amazing how the snow and bad weather only ever hits the press when London is bombarded with snow. I find that particularly hilarious. The main point though was that it is virtually impossible to invest in ploughs and other major snow-shifting equipment when we have not had a great deal of snow in the last twenty years, and there are no guarantees it will continue. If we are going to have this every year, then fair enough, let’s do it, but tough to justify the costs for something so sporadic despite the disruption and chaos. I guess the question is, does the disruption cost more than the price of the equipment? That should be the determining factor.

Good luck to any folks travelling this Christmas!