There are no endings, only beginnings

I wonder in an average lifetime, how many seriously major decisions each person has to face. I am not referring to those decisions one has to make at work in terms of which supplier to select, or on the pitch deciding whether to cross the ball in hard or low and curled to the far post. It is those major personal life-changing decisions that we all face at some point – career choices, moving abroad, marriage etc.

I am thirty years old and I feel as though I have made quite a few of them. I made another one only last week. The thought process that goes into these decisions is probably different for us all. For me, I am not one to make rash decisions when it comes to them. If it deciding where to go on holiday or whether to go see a fight in Vegas, I’ll decide within seconds/minutes and decision is made. It is similar with other decisions one has to make, I guess it is those ones which have the least impact should it turn out to be the wrong decision.

For the major decisions, I deliberate over them for quite a while. It may be about the decision itself (changing job), it may be about the timing (getting married – it was always going to happen HJ, it was just when!), but I leave nothing to chance and examine every possible effect my decision may have. I guess it is my way of minimising all risks, and the overall risk that it may be the wrong decision.

I am lucky. Ever since I was young boy with my little cap and shorts, I’ve had key people in my life who I have been able to talk to and rely on for advice. My parents, uncles, my lady....all of whom have always listened to my rambles, whinges, sulks, and in turn offered a devil to play advocate or advice on the situation. Probably more than anything, it is those conversations and interactions which gives me the confidence to make the decisions that I have made. Having the support of those people is fundamental for me. Not everybody has those people around them and I realise that I am fortunate.

The other key part of this decision-making process is the post-decision making feeling. It is not always post-decision in fact, as it can form part of the decision-making process. For me, once I have made a decision, and this applies to the small and the major ones, I do not have regrets. It is obviously easier said than done, but I try not to harbour on any negative outcomes and just make the best of it. I know deep down that I have given it plenty of thought, spoken to those people who have an opinion that I value, and if it does not work out, then so be it.

Most people around the same age have made and are frequently making these decisions. It’s part of life I guess. You just have to make the decision if one is there to be made, find the right time, and then stick your chest out and live with the outcome. It is not always easy, far from it, and it takes some cojones at times, but if it you’re unhappy or something is not right, there is one person and generally only that one person who can do something about it. Life is too short for regrets, and unless somebody knows better than me, you only live once. There are no endings, only beginnings.